Presents
by kingsmeadroad
Summary: Severus Snape's Christmas story which I found on my laptop and decided to post.


**Presents**

They were yelling again.

He was nervous. He had already tried to smooth his hair back to make it look better, though he privately knew this was a hopeless endeavour. He had not received any new clothes, and so was stuck wearing the same old rags he had been wearing for the past few weeks. He knew that this was not acceptable to the muggles, and looking at himself in the mirror, he bit his lip. He knew that he didn't look good. He could feel his eyes watering slightly, so he scrunched up his face to stop the tears from falling. He bit his lip harder and sniffed violently, turning his face away from the mirror.

It made no difference. One tiny tear escaped and fell onto his tattered shirt. The dust that had gathered on the garment was cleared when the drop of water landed, and he sniffed again to stop the tears, reaching up to scrub his face with his hands. He was dismayed to find, when he looked in the mirror again, that his hair looked even worse than before, his sleeves were dirty, and his face was now red and blotchy. Sighing sadly, he left the room and went to his bedroom, passing through the dank hall.

He could hear them screaming at each other as he went, the obscenities and accusations hurting his head as he listened. He hated this- he had a horrible squealing feeling in his stomach whenever they fought. On another day, he might have cried, but today he couldn't, because it would look ugly and he didn't want that. He really didn't want that.

Bending down to look under the rickety bed and lifting a tatty coverlet, he found what he was looking for. He smiled as he touched it and then he tucked it into his grubby shirt, hoping that it would still look alright when he got to his destination. He sniffed once more, wiped his face on his sleeve, and left the bedroom.

When he headed down the stairs (which were also filthy, dust covered and cold), he noticed the voices getting louder. They were in the kitchen, which meant he could disappear before they ever noticed and likely be back too. The sudden roar of his father's voice as he stepped on the last step made him jump and he stumbled, tripping over his open (broken) lace and hitting the ground hard. Again, the tears welled up when he landed roughly on the cold floor. He waited a moment, hoping against hope that nobody had heard him. He exhaled slowly, and his breath was visible in front of him because the house was so cold.

The shouting went on regardless, and he stumbled to his feet, his face scrunched up again to stop the tears from falling. He wasn't sure if he was upset because he had hurt himself or that nobody cared, but he didn't stop to think about it too much. He slipped quietly out the door and ran down the road as fast as he could.

The sun was setting now and the shadows were beginning to fall as orange and red flames lit up the indigo for the final few moments of daylight. He hadn't time to stop and notice the beautiful colours stretching across the sky as the darkness rolled in from the other direction and overtook the last tiny sections of shimmering blue. Neither did he stop (as he usually did) to look at the twinkling lights of the Christmas trees in the homes he passed. He always tried not to notice the happiness that emanated from those houses- the warmth and the roaring fires in the grate were symbols of life that he so desired, but never saw for himself.

He was panting when he reached the house he now recognised so well- even if only from standing nearby and looking at it wistfully. He was cautious, but there was no one about to laugh at him, point at him or make jokes about him. He was still breathless and knew that he would look even less appropriate now. But he had come specially, so he was still going to do what he had to do.

He walked through the gate and edged closer to the door, his stomach nervous again, but in a different way this time. He took a few deep breaths - partially for the nerves, and partially because he could barely breathe. Before he could stop himself, he rushed up the few steps and rapped on the door.

It was a few seconds- hellish seconds during which he considered running away- before it opened with a click and a small head appeared from the inside.

Her head.

His face broke into a wide smile, and she smiled too. She looked so happy to see him and he instantly felt better. Her red hair and green eyes made her look even prettier in the evening, and the last purple blotches of light were shining on her face.

"Hi Sev!" she said, bouncing out to talk to him. He smiled at her quietly, almost in awe of her.

"I've brought you something. It's only something small, but y'know.. It's for Christmas... tomorrow."

She grinned widely at him, then frowned. "I don't have...."

He was privately dismayed that she had not gotten anything for him, but he shook his head and said "It's not important. I'm not expecting anything, I just saw this and thought of you." Knowing that she did not like him as much as he liked her- and that she hadn't gotten him a gift- made him believe that telling her he had looked for hours and spent what little money he had on it, might be a bad idea.

She giggled all of a sudden. "No, Sev! You think I got you nothing! Silly! Of course I did, I just don't have it wrapped properly yet. Does that matter?" A warm feeling filled his stomach and he shook his head happily. "No! 'Course not!"

He reached into his shirt and took out the gift, and handed it to her. It was wrapped in green and silver paper and she looked thrilled to accept it. Smiling at him and looking excited, she asked could she open it before she gave him his gift. He nodded and happily said, "Yeah!"

She carefully pulled apart the wrapping and opened the tiny velvet box to reveal a little necklace, a chain with a rose charm- that looked delicate and fragile and perfect- hanging from it. As she watched, the rose seemed to become prettier and prettier, culminating in it blooming red and then fading back to silver again. She wasn't sure if it was genuinely magical or if he was somehow doing it- but it was definitely the prettiest thing she had ever received and she squealed happily at him jumping closer and hugging him warmly. "Thanks Sev!"

He blushed into her hair and hugged her back- delighted that for once, what he looked like didn't matter (not that it ever had, but he did not know that). He had made her happy! "You're welcome."

When she pulled away, she told him to wait one second and she ran into the house again. He waited on the step, beginning to shiver now that night was falling properly. He would have to get home soon. She knew that though, and she was back quickly. As she ran to the hall to get to the door again, someone called out to her.

"It's okay Tuney, I'll only be a second!!" Lily called back, and breathless, she arrived at the door. "Take it with you Sev, and I'll see you soon. If Tuney knows you're here she'll only make fun! Go!"

He nodded at her and smiled again, before turning to go. He looked back just before she closed the door to see her looking at the present she had just received and smiling happily. "Lil?" he said softly.  
She looked up, though she could barely see him in the twilight. "Thanks," he murmured. She nodded, smiled and closed the door softly.

He ran home. It was dark, and when he arrived, he tucked the gift she had given him into his clothes again. The clouds were rolling in over the stars as he slipped in the door- there might be snow tomorrow, judging by the sudden cold. Snow meant he might be able to go and see Lily, if she was out playing with her friends.

The house inside was even colder than it had been outside- cold and unwelcoming and gloomy. The shouting was still going on- and likely would for hours, culminating in him receiving no presents again tomorrow morning- just like every other Christmas morning. But he at least had one gift this year. He ran up the stairs as quietly as he could and into his bedroom, where he perched against the bed and took out the box she had given him. There was a note attached to it, which he read first.

"Sev!

This is what we'll look like when we leave school!

Happy Christmas!

Love,

Lily xx"

He opened the box (ribboned, but without paper around it; he didn't realise that this was somewhat backwards, having never received a gift before) and sitting inside it were two tiny figurine dolls. One was a girl, dressed in a long crimson dress and holding a white staff. Her hair was curly and red and she was wearing a golden cloak. The other was a boy, wearing black robes, and a black cloak, holding a wand aloft. His black hair was swept back, and he looked brave and strong. He was exactly what Sev wanted to be, exactly what he wanted to seem like- and he was thrilled, even if only for a little while, that this was how Lily saw him.

He looked up, biting his lip again and clutching the two figures in his hand as though they were worth the world to him. He glanced out the window, to where the first flakes of snow were beginning to fall. The starlight was shining through onto his pale face and he knew, somehow, that she was watching it too- and he felt suddenly warm and loved.

He sat there for hours, watching the snow fall against the window and gather on the sill, clutching the tiny gift she had given him- an emblem of hope against the stark bitterness he knew too well. He held onto that hope with a small sad smile on his face as the snow fell softly, silently, beautifully, against the dark outside.

The yelling went on, but he just didn't hear it any more.


End file.
